"Seize"

While Ashley and I were lazin' it up, just chillin' and checking out facebook. A notification popped up, and I clicked and our journey to laughter-land began. Here is what went down:
me: Hey Ash, he just called his girlfriend.."spastically beautiful"
Ashley: I just think it's funny because she's epileptic.
Me: OMG!
Ashley: I'm a terrible person.
Me: That's ok...costume party in hell?
Ashley: Yep.
Oh the sh*t my friends say...

"Parkinson's?"

Our friend Kieslana has the shakiest hands known to mankind. While we were pinning her halloween costume we looked down and her hands were moving ninety-to-nothin' and Ashley looks over and says:
"Do you have like, Parkinson's or something?"
Oh...the Sh*t my friends say.....

"Magic Bullet"

Here's the newest gem:

Adam: "Do you know those things that make your hair poof? They are on infomercials."
Ashleigh/Ashley: "Bump-its!"
Adam: "Ya"
Ashley: "They don't work."
Ashleigh: "I have some, and no, they don't."
Adam: "You guys watch too many infomercials."
Ashley: "My favorite is the 'Magic Bullet' one."
Ashleigh: "Isn't that a vibrator?!"

oh the shit my friends say :]

"Vanilla vs Turkey"

So, Ashleigh, Shelby, Adam and I were at Subway and I ordered my normal sandwich, which is turkey, cheese, and lettuce. So I sit down and pull out my sandwich and Adam looks at me and says, "Is that just turkey?!"
Me, "yessss....."
Adam: "Are you serious?! That's like goin to Baskin Robbins and ordering vanilla!"

oh the shit my friends say.

"Terminally Ill"

So Ashley and I were sitting at a restaurant and we noticed a little girl who was sitting behind the register, and she look really ill, possibly a cancer patient. While we were getting ready to order we hear this little girl start to throw a fit, and I couldn't believe what came out of Ashley's mouth:
Ashley: "Just because you are terminally ill, does not give you a reason to act like that!"

Oh the sh** my friends say

"So..... did you want the gum?"

While watching a movie with my friend Courtney I asked her if she had any gum. She dug around in her purse and said that all she had was cinnamon gum. Here's how the conversation went:
Courtney: It's cinnamon, is that ok?
Me: I love anything to do with "Sin" and "Men"
Courtney: So.....did you want the gum?
Oh......the sh*t my friends say....

"I just love men"

While watching "The Fast and the Furious" it showed thw two hotties in uniform. This is how the conversation went:
Ashley: OMG! I LOVE a man in uniform.
Me: ....I just love men.
Ashley: You would.
Oh...the shi*t my friends and I say